Entry Two

Dear Diary,

I sat in class today, chewing on my pen as the professor went on with the boring lesson in his monotone voice. I kept looking out the window, the Georgia rain is beautiful and calming. So many people had colorful umbrellas, but I prefer to walk in the rain, soaking it all up, it's so freeing.

Once the bell rang I was out of that class, I had so much on my mind and I wanted to walk.

Up and down all the hills, the rain pouring, wondering what was going to happen. Why was I left alone in this world? I had no one and nothing, people around me finding their 'soul mates' or getting ready to return home to their families, and I will be sitting in my dark room with only the sound of the wild animals to keep me company.

I kept thinking about him, we were once so happy and in love, it was all so long ago. He told me he loved me, and that he'd never leave me, he said he knew what he was getting into. I should have known better than to believe him. Nobody ever knows what they are getting into when they become a part of this life, they only know what they read in stories or see in the movies, they just don't get it. I'm just glad that he's on the other side of the world, in Romania, where I don't have to deal with his horrible behavior. If he were here, I would be obligated to get rid of him - permanently.

As I was walking I was so focused on my thoughts that I almost ran into Jason - literally.

"Sorry, I was 'in the zone' " I said jokingly.
"Yeah.. I could tell. " he looked troubled. Out of all the powers in the universe, mind reading was not one of them, though I desperately wished it was - at least some of the time.
"Are you alright?" I asked, maybe he'd willingly offer the information.

"Yeah, I guess so.. It's just.. well. Nevermind." He said, I knew he wanted to say it, but he just wasn't going to offer it up so easily.

"What? You can talk to me you know." I said, thinking maybe I could have a human connection, he started walking, thinking, his hands in his pockets.

"Why.. just...I don't get it Ivy, why are girls so complicated?" He said. Ah, Rose.. making life complicated as always.

"What do you mean?" I asked, as if I didn't know, I can't just give my opinion without the specifics or it's one of those 'you knew and you didn't tell me? why didn't you tell me?' oh cuz people always shoot the messenger.

"I love her Ivy. She's amazing, but something is always wrong. She either wants to go out and party, or she thinks I'm talking to my ex girlfriends too much, she thinks she's fat, she thinks I think she's ugly - which is ridiculous, because she's not. She thinks I'll cheat on her, with some stupid girl that I went out with ONCE!" He said exasperated.

"She's just insecure Jason. I'm sure if you just reassure her, things will be fine." I said trying to be supportive - even though I'm not. What I really wanted to say, my faithful friend, was that she's just stringing him on, afraid of commitment and that she wants any excuse she can find to make him as miserable as possible so that he'll leave her and she's not the bad guy. But I wouldn't ever say that to him, in all my years of living, I've learned that people need to make their own mistakes.

The conversation continued on for a few minutes, when he decided he wanted to go think about things and left. It was raining after-all and who likes to stand in the rain, right?

Diary, I don't know what to do right now, I wish I could tell him my secrets, he should know the truth don't you think?

Until the next time, your faithful friend,

Ivy